Many years ago, a little boy by the name of Kevin Andrew Collins was abducted from a bus stop in San Francisco. While this abduction may have been just one of many, this particular case hit the SF community really hard. You couldn't go anywhere without hearing about this story - and this was prior to the internet, prior to Amber Alert. Everyone was afraid. This little boy could have been a friend of mine; he could have been a classmate or someone I saw during CYO league games. I went to a local Catholic school, played in after school sports, took the bus alone, and played outside after school, generally unsupervised. In fact, often but not always, I had taken the same bus he did.
It's scary to think about child abductions, but they happen. I'm sure they probably happened as much in the 80s as they do now. It's just more publicized now. Many parents nowadays never let their children out of their sight, in fear of the stranger lurking in the car, the man asking your child's help to look for a lost dog, or a woman offering candy. We worry. It only takes a second, most parents think. Right?
Well, that's what I think. I'm paranoid. I think worst case scenarios. Even though I was known to play outside on the street for long periods of time unsupervised, I don't allow my kids the same freedom. Walking 10 blocks alone in San Francisco - on busy streets - after school seemed like no big deal to me, but I cringe at the thought of letting my daughter ride her bike alone, around our nice, friendly, residential neighborhood.
I'm not sure what the balance is, the balance of giving our child her freedom while keeping her safe. No one wants to make a decision only to regret it later. I'm sure time and time again, Kevin Collins' parents think, "If only..." and how horrible that would be?! I can only imagine the guilt...but it's not their fault, of course. And to some degree, are we now only sheltering our kids?
I ask because my kids are picked up by either myself or family friends from school each day. I don't like them to play outside unsupervised. However, on a daily basis, i see children walking home without adult supervision. Some look as young as 8 years old. Of course, it could be just a young looking 10 year old, but still, it makes me wonder. At what point is it okay to allow a child to walk alone to go home? At what point is it okay to leave a child unsupervised?
While the National SAFEKIDS Campaign recommends that no child under the age of 12 be left at home alone, most states have no laws in this regard. In Maryland, children need to be at least 8 years old in order to stay home alone; In Illinois, the age is 14; In California, there are no laws stating how old the child must be.
I realize that an age is not a magic number; some children can probably stay home alone or walk home alone younger than others. But, let's say your child is mature and responsible...and the only thing you need to worry about are predators.
In that case, at what age is it okay to allow your child to walk home alone? Or stay home alone?
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