Live Life with No Regrets #2

Continuing with my reflections on the top 37 things dying people say they regret...

 #36.) Never performing in front of others. This may not be your true calling, but trying it at least once is an important life experience.

I am not a performer.  I do not act.  I most definitely cannot sing.  And unless the macarena  and the "white shuffle" count, I cannot dance. 

That's me, the Keystone Cop

However, like many people, I have had my share of parts in school performances.  In my grammar school, everyone had to be in the school Christmas show.  It wasn't an option.  It was just what we did in my K-8 school.  This means I was in nine Christmas play performances, but I only vaguely remember three: the time I played a keystone cop and ran around chasing someone else, the year I was one of the Hiawatha story narrators, and the play Godspell (though I have no idea which part I played).  What I remember most about these experiences is that I was either nervous or embarrassed.  The most "at ease" of the three I recall is when I was the narrator, but I still felt the pressure and stress of having to remember all the words.  I was terrified I was going to mess it all up and the other narrators would have to step in for me.  I was concerned they would be upset if I messed up.

In high school, the only time I performed was for the required freshman class play.  I do not remember why we had to do this, except I remember hearing that it was a tradition that all freshman classes performed for the school.  Our play was Grease and I was one of the background beauty school dropout singers.  I didn't want to be in that, either.

Truth be told, I was just too afraid - afraid of looking stupid, afraid of not being good enough. I never had that ability to let loose and be okay with looking silly.  I didn't even dress up for Halloween or Spirit Week. Once, a couple of my friends dragged me to a theater audition at another high school.  I refused to try out and just watched them do it.  I remember standing there and thinking, "OMG.  JUST GO DOWN THERE AND TRY IT."  And I couldn't make myself do it.

I let fear control me.  That was when I was 14.

Fortunately, things changed.  

When I was 17, I went on a cruise with my parents.  The cruise activities included a lip syncing contest.  My stepfather encouraged me to do it.  He was always full of compliments.  He made me believe I would be awesome and could win.  He truly helped increase my self-confidence...and he is one of the reasons I changed into a more self-confident person, a person who is able to face her fears.  So, I "competed" in the lip synching contest...by myself, a solo performance at that!

And guess what!  

I won.  That's right.  Me.  I WON.  Woot.  

But I'm going to "keep it real" here.  It wasn't karaoke, so no one had to actually hear me sing.  It was just me pretending to sing and dancing around. There were also a lot of senior citizens and drunk people on this cruise, so a sober teenager with semi-acceptable rhythm, a bright smile, and correct lip synching skills could easily win this tiny little "competition," especially since it was based on CHEERING from the audience.  I wasn't delusional.  I was never going to become famous for my performance.

No matter.  I won and I got a trophy. HAHA.  BUT MORE IMPORTANT was that I had fun.

And guess what? That wasn't my last lip synching performance. I did a few more, on cruises and one in the dorms during college...and they were a BLAST to do.  Super fun.  Just a couple minutes to act silly, have fun, and let loose.

Like #36 said, it may not be a "true calling," but it's definitely something to experience at least once.  I'm glad I got over my childhood fear, stepped out of my comfort zone, and performed in front of an audience.  

P.S. And for the record, I dress up every Halloween now, too.

Have you ever performed in front of an audience?

Live Life With No Regrets #1

Note: One of my new goals is to blog more. Years ago, it helped me process issues - help me relieve stress, help give me clarity, or just plain ole' let me vent.  If you have decided to read my ramblings, please note that I am not writing to be a writer.  I am simply writing for me.  Also keep in mind that I have been and always will be a little bit crazy, so reading the thoughts from my mind may confuse or annoy you - or maybe just make you laugh at my insanity.  I often write like I talk....so, consider yourself warned.

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And so...now it's time to

A former student posted a link to a blog entitled, "Here Are The Top 37 Things Dying People Say They Regret. Learn From It Before It’s Too Late." The idea falls in line with one of the classes I teach: Creating a Meaningful Life.  What makes your life meaningful?  How can you ensure that you can live a life with no regrets?  Alongside other more academic topics, we discuss how we can create meaning in our own lives.

Thirty-seven things are quite a lot and while I can ramble as good as the next blogger, I also do not have an unlimited amount of time to sit here right now and blog about all of them.  Thus, each blog entry I will attempt to write about one of the 37 Things. (You see how I did that?  I didn't say each day.  I'm just not sure exactly how committed I can be to blogging. HAHA.)  Since it's my blog and I can do as I please, I'm going to pick them in random order.  First up is #5:

Missing the chance to see your favorite musicians. You never truly know when your favorite band might break up, so seize the day.



This is so true.  I also have to say this falls in line with any sort of show: concert, broadway show, comedian, performance.  Tickets may be expensive, but they are worth it.  The memories stay with you for your entire life.

My friends and I went to quite a few concerts "back in the day," but one of my best memories is from December 31, 1991.  Yes, that was a long time ago, but seeing Nirvana and the Red Hot Chili Peppers on New Year's Eve was amazing.  It was also the first (and last) time I actually went into a mosh pit. Oh, the memories! HA!

While I see concerts less now than I did during college, if there is a band I want to hear, I will be there!  Same thing with any type of performance or show.  A friend of mine and I recently saw Margaret Cho and we have tickets to see Anjelah Johnson next month!  Woo hoo!


I try my best to live life with no regrets.  No one ever knows what is going to happen - whether a performer will stop performing, whether a band will break up, or whether or not we'll even be around to see them!

So far, so good.  Check 1 out of the 37!  How about you?  How often do you see concerts/shows?

Gratitude Post #5: Family Vacations

I am so grateful for vacations.  It doesn't really matter to me if it's a stay-cation or a vacation where I travel somewhere, I am just appreciative of the time to spend "getting away from it all."

Lucky for me, this past week, I spent a few days in Disneyland with my husband and kids.  We hadn't been on vacation together since 2011.  (My husband is not a big fan of traveling and has tended to "cash out" vacation days - a true workaholic.)  But truth be told, the last couple years, we were also trying to save money for bills and other things and a "big" family vacation was just not in the budget.

Speaking of budgets, one of the best decisions I made was reserving a condo near Disneyland.  Not only did we save money by eating at "home" most meals, but we had a space to get away from the parks.  It was still walking distance (which was awesome) and we had two bedrooms, a kitchen, and 2.5 bathrooms!  The kids could go to bed and we could stay up.  We could snack on tangerines and eat mac & cheese for dinner instead of spending a fortune at a restaurant.  It was fabulous.  I definitely plan on staying at condos for future Disneyland visits!







The trip was filled with fun rides, like the Cars Ride, Splash Mountain, Indiana Jones, and Pirates of the Caribbean.  We rode Toy Story Mania for the first time.  We actually got on all the rides we wanted pretty easily, opting to head to the park when it opened and leaving after lunch to miss the lines.  SCORE!  We even rode on the several rides twice.  Woot!  Seriously can't beat that.

One day, after getting on all the rides we wanted, we went to Downtown Disney and watched the movie, "Frozen" at the AMC.  We also made the obligatory stop at the Lego Store, probably one of my son's favorite stores ever!



Finally, we finished off our trip with breakfast at Goofy's Kitchen before heading home.  I got to see one of my favorite characters: Baloo from the Jungle Book.  The Mad Hatter was also especially entertaining.  He was seriously cracking me up with his conversation!  I also love how Pluto just forced himself into a picture with my husband!  haha.  Sully from Monsters did the same thing, pushing him closer.  This is probably why you see him smiling in the photos! HAHA.

It was definitely a fun time and I know the kids liked getting to spend so much time with their dad.

Sometimes vacations can be stressful and tiring.  But sometimes they can be both tiring and relaxing.  We were tired from all the walking, but it was relaxing getting to just "chill" at the condo, eat normal food, watch TV, or even play with puzzles.  I truly feel blessed that we were able to have such a wonderful family vacation.

Gratitude post #4: Candles

There are so many HUGE things for which I am grateful, but there are also the "little" things that make me happy.  For Christmas, I received two Aurorae soy candles: lavender and eucalyptus.

It's amazing how certain smells make me happy.  I know it seems so silly, but it is the little things that sometimes can brighten my day.

Still up to use is my all-time favorite, Bath and Body Works Eucalyptus Spearmint Candle.  Of course, that whole line rocks.  I have the hand lotion, the body wash, and the body cream.  Smells good and relieves stress.  It's that whole aromatherapy thing.

Yes, I am grateful for my wonderful candles!

Gratitude Post #3: Everything We Need...and much of what we want

I happened upon this website called 2Hands.org.  Essentially, its mission is to help those who need help - and allow "angels" to give what they can.  People post their stories and what they need, like help with PG&E bills or Christmas gifts for their children.  "Angels" can then contact the poster and help.

And this is where people start saying, 'Ah.  There are probably so many scammers out there or those who don't really need something." Yeah, yeah, you skeptical Grinch-like people!  I know that it is possible that there are people who take advantage of organizations like this, BUT there are also so many people who legitimately need a helping hand.  So many people in the world are one or two paychecks away from being homeless.  They struggle to get basic needs met and are unable to buy Christmas presents for their kids or put food on the table.  I can only imagine how heartbreaking it must be to not be able to provide for my kids.

So many of us take what we have for granted.  We mistake what we want for things we need.  Yes, I need food to eat, but do I need all the extras we buy, like chocolate or chips? Did I need to buy new towels or did I just get them because they were "a good deal"?  Did I need that new board game...or did I get it to just add to my collection?

I am blessed - and most of the things we buy nowadays are wants, things we can definitely do without. We are fortunate to be working.  We are fortunate to be able to afford the "extras" now.  There are so many who are not as fortunate.  I am grateful we are have everything we need....and much of what we want.

I only wish I was able to help everyone on that website.  If you have lot of love in your heart and a little to spare, please take a minute to look at the website and be someone's Angel this holiday season.

Gratitude Post #2: My Students

As university faculty, I have the opportunity to meet a lot of students.  I admit that I have had my fair share of frustrating students, but overall, I feel very blessed to have had met so many wonderful and inspiring students.

• I love learning about my students' passion for their major, their future goals, and their future dreams.

• I love seeing them collaborate with other students, getting inspired and excited about a project.

• I love hearing news about getting a dream internship, an interview for a job, or a scholarship award!

• I love getting updates from students I taught in the past, seeing wedding photos, getting baby announcements, hearing about their travels, and so on.

I truly do appreciate all the wonderful students I have met throughout the last 12.5 years.

And since it's Thursday, here's a Throwback Thursday photo!

This is a photo from 6 years ago - the students standing near me (why I decided to sit on the floor, I have no idea.) are all grown up now!  Awww!

I am still amazed

(Warning:  Total mushiness ahead.  And I'm not saying our relationship is perfect.  Obviously, there are still things he does that drive me crazy and some days I'd like to smack him - figuratively, of course - but overall, more often than not, I find myself so grateful and blessed that my husband still loves me after all these years.)

Sixteen years ago, my husband and I got married after having dated for 6 years.  This means that this month marked 22 years of our being together.  We have been together a long time...and I still find it amazing how strong our relationship is.

Amazing.
                         Unbelievable.

Freakin' unreal.

Let's be honest.  In today's culture, it is more common to hear about divorce than married couples who have made it this long, especially if the relationship started between a preppy, sorority girl and a heavy-metal headbanger with piercings, both barely out of their teen years.

Dating for almost a year...

What the heck?

I know, it's crazy, right?  No one thought we would make it.  I admit that neither of us were even thinking that way.  Sure, I liked him.  Yes, I thought he was cute.  But to think forever?  Please!  Prior to my husband, my longest relationship had lasted days - okay, a few weeks - but I am not sure I can even call that a relationship.  I had some serious commitment issues, so I had never imagined marrying anyone, especially not someone who was so completely "not my type."  And before you think I was a cold-hearted b-word, let me share this little tidbit:  it was not something on his mind either.  In fact, early on, he actually point-blank said to me, "Don't take me too seriously."  He even wrote it on the Christmas card he sent me after we had been dating a couple months.  Clearly, we were just taking it day-by-day.

But you know what?  You just never know what life has in store....

Somewhere along the way, it happened: we fell in love.

For some reason, it worked - we worked - and I knew. I can't remember exactly when that was.  Maybe it was during one of my "distance makes the heart grow fonder" phases.  One summer I even went to Japan for 2.5 months.  Much to my surprise, I spent a good deal of money calling him once a week and crying on the phone, wailing about how much I missed him. (Good grief.  However did he put up with THAT?)  Gone were the days of my "game-playing" and acting like I didn't care that much - even when I had.  Instead, letters were sent almost every day.  Tears were shed as I counted down the days to go home and see him.  It's surprising I didn't scare the crap out of him right there, being all clingy and emotional. haha.

The difference for me was that we were able to be ourselves with one another - be stupid, be goofy, be honest.  Maybe that's just who he is, but for me, I had always seemed to have this persona I felt  I needed to be....until I was with him.  He accepted all my craziness: my only child tendencies; my desire to travel for weeks, sometimes months at a time; my habit of wanting to take a million photos, even indulging me when I took photos of us wearing silly eye masks or humongous 3-d glasses. (I'd share those two photos as well, but I think there *is* a limit to how much he'll accept now! haha.)

And now, here we are....22 years later, grown-ups (or so we fool people into believing we are) with careers, two kids, a mortgage, and bills.  And while some things have changed, some things feel exactly the same.  (cue sappy music)  Believe it or not (and sometimes I have a hard time believing it myself), I love this man as much as I did when I first fell in love with him - maybe even more. Okay, probably more.

I am still amazed....and so very grateful.

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*Note: I will be attempting to write more regularly.  My goal is to write at least once a week, about something for which I am grateful.