Displays of Affection

I bought my husband a Valentine's Day card. I know, big deal, right? Well, to be honest, I'm not all that fabulous about getting cards for my husband. Sometimes I just don't. Why? Because I figure he doesn't really care either way. (Maybe he does, but I don't think so.)  Mind you, he *has* to get me a card...or I'll be pissed. Double standard? Hell yes. So be it.

But that's about all I expect.  I've never been a big romantic.  I don't like grand gestures.  In fact, one of my male friends was telling me how he was planning to surprise his girlfriend on Valentine's Day with either participating in some huge Pillow Fight (http://www.pillowfight.info/) or having some romantic restaurant dinner with flowers, chocolates, etc.

Barf.

I know.  I'm horrible.  Maybe it's the Virgo practicality in me, but the idea of all that makes me laugh - and not in a good way.  For me, I find it's the little things that I appreciate: asking me if I'd like an iced tea (he makes the best iced tea), cooking a fantastic meal, letting me sleep in while he takes the kids to school.  And think about it - these are things he does on a regular basis, rather than one huge gesture on Valentine's Day and/or my birthday.

Anyhow, as I was saying, I found the perfect card to tell him how I feel about him...it's cheesy and overly lovey-dovey, but it really does say how I feel. Isn't that what Hallmark is all about?

The card says..

for my WONDERFUL HUSBAND on Valentine's Day

I love being married to you,
You are the rock of my life.
Of all the decisions that I ever made,
the best one is being your wife.

I love coming home to your smile,
your strong arms around me in bed...
My deepest delight is belonging to you,
with our dreams for a lifetime ahead.

Whenever I saw the word "husband,"
I'm thankful all over again
I'm blessed with the gift of a lifetime --
the sweetest, most loving of men.

You made me the happiest woman
the day that I promised "I do,"
and my heart is completely devoted
to spending forever with you.

Happy Valentine's Day
with all my love.

We have been married for over 12 years. And while some years were more challenging than others, I am incredibly thankful that I was fortunate enough to meet my husband when I did - and blessed that we still love one another after all these years. It helps that he's nice to look at, too - at least I think so.

No Wonder Men Think We're Crazy!!!

On my morning radio show, the DJs took a question for some of their listeners:

--------My best friend and I both already purchased wedding dresses. Neither of us are engaged. We don't have boyfriends, either. Do you think this is crazy?---------

WTF? Really? No wonder some men are afraid of women, getting trapped or tied down. I never understood when my male friends would talk about how women were trying to trap them. Um, what? Who are these women?

The majority of my female friends and I were never like that, never rushing into relationships. I do admit knowing a few "crazy" women like this, those planning their weddings and their married lives without even being in a relationship. Meanwhile, my plans had included working on a cruise ship as Activities Director, flirting with the cute, male passengers and traveling around the world.

I guess we all have our girlhood dreams. HA!

Do most of the females you know plan their wedding THIS far in advance? When should a woman buy a dress?

2009 in perspective

1. What did you do in 2009 that you'd never done before?
I started taking Tae Kwon Do classes.

2. What's your most memorable moment in your year?
Looking at glaciers. It's one thing to see it on tv. It's a whole new thing to see ice in the water, especially if you're used to sunny days most of the year.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
One of my best friends had a baby boy - my godson. Aaaaw.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
No

5. What states did you visit?
Alaska. Woot!

6. What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009?
I can't really say that we lacked this year. Sure, my husband was laid off for a couple months. Sure, money is tight, but we have our health and our family. Oh, that reminds me. If I could, I'd like to request NO vertigo episodes this year. Now THAT would be awesome.

7. What moments from 2009 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
On a positive note, spending 10 days on a luxurious cruise with my family has to be one of the best memories! From those 10 days came lots of wonderful moments: seeing the Mendenhall Glacier, celebrating my mom's 60th birthday, and ziplining in the rain.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Hmmm...how do you measure achievement? Nothing really stands out - just that I try to live each day as though as it's my last. Some days I didn't do such a great job, but overall, I think I did well.

9. What was your biggest failure?
Losing my temper. I've had it under control for several years, but I lost it once this year...really badly.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Sure. Sadly, I had two vertigo episodes and then learned I suffer from sleep apnea. This, of course, explained why I was so exhausted all the time.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
A cruise vacation. Oh, you mean...an object? Lemme get back to you.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
My daughter. After hearing how she isn't good at sports (from her) and saying, "Nah. I don't like it," she stepped out of her comfort zone, signed up for volleyball and, if I do say so myself, got to be a pretty darn good player, going for the ball and bumping it. Not only that, but she also decided to try her hand at basketball!

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
No comment. Why drudge up the negative again?

14. Where did most of your money go?
Hands down - bills. Like anyone else, the economy is kicking our butts.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Ziplining with Ken

16. What song will always remind you of 2009?
:shrug: None. I don't remember songs for each year very well.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) Happier or sadder? Happier
b) Thinner or fatter? Fatter
c) Richer or poorer? Poorer

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Sleeping that included REM sleep. HA.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Wasting time online.

20. How did you spend Christmas?
With family

21. Did you fall in love in 2009?
I have been fortunate enough to still be in love...after 18 years, that's a big deal. Then again, maybe it's more of a big deal that HE is still in love with me after all these years. HAHAHA. Maybe he needs a medal or a beer. HAHAHA.

22. How many one-night stands?
Please. That's a zero...haven't had one of those in.....um...ever in my whole life.

23. What were your favorite TV programs?
Survivor: Samoa, Cold Case, CSI: NY, Project Runway

24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
No. I don't hate people. It's not worth my energy. Annoyed? Well, I am human...but I'm working on trying to let it all go!

25. What was the best book you read this year?
Shanghai Sisters by Lisa See

26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
:shrug:

27. What did you want and get?
Spend quality time with the family. The downside of my husband getting laid off was obviously financial issues, but the upside is that we got to spend a lot of time together as a family for a couple months. :)

28. What did you want and not get?
Thinner...but clearly that is because I spent too much time baking blondies, building gingerbread houses, and eating them all. HAHA.

29. What was your favorite film of this year?
I really liked The Proposal and The Blind Side. Yes, I'm a Sandra Bullock fan.

30. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
Turned 39...and was coming back from the cruise. Basically, I spent my birthday week being pampered and eating lots of food. Oh, that could be another reason for #28. Ha!

31. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Can't think of anything really...I try to look on the positive side of things and I think, overall, it's been a great year.

32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?
Lazy...casual...comfortable. Yoga pants are my best friend, even though I don't do yoga. HAHAHAHAHA

33. What kept you sane?
My kids...though they also drive me crazy. Go figure.

34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Honestly, I haven't been that "up" with celebrities. I pretty much Tivo my programs and ignore the hoopla.

35. What political issue stirred you the most?
Clearly it's the CA budget crisis. It's affecting my workplace, my students, and my personal budget.

36. Who did you miss?
I missed my father-in-law. I spent a good deal of time with my mother-in-law the past year, taking her on errands and visiting. And while I enjoy spending time with her, being at her house makes me miss him even more. I miss his typing on the keyboard; hearing his stories about "the wife," as he lovingly called her; and his laughter when he found something funny, either on TV or while hanging out with the grandkids.

37. Who was the best new person you met?
YOU! haha.

38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2009:
Sometimes it's best to just go to the doctor to find out what the problem is, rather than thinking it's just nothing.

39. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
What is with this whole song/music thing. I suck at this.

40. Do you think 2010 will be a better year for you?
Why wouldn't it be?

Trash or Treasure?

"I find a lot of good stuff on the side of the road. You'd be surprised what some people throw away." - Augustine, 68 years, on Hoarders

I was watching this show called Hoarders the other day and was completely disturbed by it.  I realize that it's a disorder of some kind - to keep so much stuff that you can't walk around in a house - but I was appalled.  Some woman had two dead cats in her house  She had thought the cats had ran away, but they had been dead for years so they were in like freeze-dried condition.  As a child, her son had heard cockroaches crawling at night and had to sleep with a fan directed at him in order to keep the roaches off him; he had been removed from the home and never returned.  The bathroom ceiling was falling down onto the inoperable toilet with feces in it.  There was no water and the city was threatening to condemn the property.

I'm sorry, but really?  R E A L L Y???

Who are these people?  How does one get this far into filth and not notice it?  Is it a slow process?  Does it start with small clutter and then turn into packed tooms and overstuffed closets?

I guess I shouldn't be so surprised.  I often put things on our street marked "free" just to see what will happen.  Seriously?  A highchair, clothing, carseat, bouncer, and toys all disappeared within hours.  While most of the things were in good condition, I think some was questionable. A carseat?   
 
But I guess, as they say, one man's trash is another man's treasure.  If my husband has any say in it, everyone else's trash will be our trash, too!  
 
On that note, I should get ready to clear out more things.

Wow...6 months?

It's hard to believe that once upon a time I was an avid blogger, someone who wrote daily blogs on topics ranging from news features to basic rants about "stupid" people I encountered.

And now...

I haven't blogged regularly in months.  In fact, I had forgotten I had this one. 

I would like to start blogging more, at least about my kids...so I can remember all the funny, endearing, and/or frustrating moments about being a mom.

We'll see how that goes...only time will tell.

Another day, another ailment

I'm not sure if it's stress or what, but I have not been all that healthy as of late. I had another round of Vertigo this last weekend - YES, over the holiday weekend! WTF - that lasted until today. I feel a lot better today, but if I move too much (like trying to get 5 loads of laundry washed, dried, folded, and put away) I tend to get a little dizzy. At least it's not the dizziness of the first day, where I felt nauseous after walking less than 10 feet.

This is the second time I have had Vertigo. The first time was in May and I had no idea what the hell was wrong with me. I have to admit that it must be a bit karmic. Years ago, I had a staff person call in sick with Vertigo and while I accepted her reason, when I hung up, I thought, "What kind of made-up illness is that?" But let me tell you, Vertigo is no joke. I'd take a head cold that lasted 10 days over 4 days of Vertigo.

From the research I've read, Vertigo strikes people when they get older. Apparently, I am getting "older" or there is something else going on. Because I have been a pretty healthy person up till this year, I scheduled an appointment with the doctor tomorrow. I want to rule out that the symptoms I am feeling are part of a larger problem at play. Or figure out how to avoid getting Vertigo again.

I have too much to do. I don't have time for crap like this. Seriously.

Have you ever had symptoms like dizziness or being unbalanced? 

(Obviously, I mean when sober...not the whoozy, spinning rooms from being intoxicated! haha)

The Worst Mom Ever

I know he is just trying to get his way. And I know I must keep the boundaries and follow-through. However, this constant crying...makes me feel like the worst mom ever.

Some days I feel like the worst mom ever. Don't get me wrong. Some days I feel like the best mom ever, but today was not one of those days.

Or actually, maybe I was a bit schizophrenic today. We had our ups and downs. After one meltdown, we played with rubber stamps and all was well. A short 30 minutes later, he was back in tears. Yes, he was overtired, but it didn't make me feel any better.

My son is almost 3.5 years old. In his short life, he has tested my patience more times than I can count. I cannot even begin to imagine what a simple day without a tantrum looks like. Okay, I exaggerate. I have those days. But again, today was not one of those days.

He is the most stubborn child I have ever known. And trust me, I have known a lot. I worked in the childcare field for over a decade. I thought I had seen stubborn. Clearly, I was mistaken. If God gives us only what we can handle, apparently, he thinks I can handle a whole lot...and I am not sure I am cut out for the job.

Today, he cried for about 30 or so minutes because he wanted to look at some photographs. Thing is, he wanted to only see them with me, not with Daddy, not with his sister, just me. I had told him it was time for bed and no stalling. He was not having it. In the end, I did not relent - no photograph looking - and he ended up asleep. Seriously though, prior to his peaceful slumber, I wanted to BASH MY HEAD AGAINST THE WALL....HARD...MULTIPLE TIMES.

About a month ago, he cried in the for 40 minutes because he wanted to go to the pumpkin patch. He cries if you tell him he can't have what he wants.

The irony? He cries less when he actually hurts himself. The other night, my daughter accidentally closed the door on his fingers. It must have scraped because it pulled some skin. It looked really painful. Total crying time? FIVE whole minutes and he was off running again.